Strikes the bell for 5 o'clock, Uncle Arthur closes shop Screws the tops on all the bottles, turns the lights out, locks it up Climbs across his bike and he's away Cycles past the gasworks, past the river, down the high street Back to mother, it's another empty day [Chorus] Uncle Arthur likes his mommy Uncle Arthur still reads comics Uncle Arthur follows Batman Round and round the rumours fly, how he ran away from Mum On his 32nd birthday, told her that he'd found a chum Mother cried and raved and yelled and fussed Arthur left her no illusion, brought the girl round, save confusion Sally was the real thing, not just lust [Chorus] Uncle Arthur vanished quickly Uncle Arthur and his new bride Uncle Arthur follows Sally Round and round goes Arthur's head, hasn't eaten well for days Little Sally may be lovely, but cooking leaves her in a maze Uncle Arthur packed his bags and fled Back to mother, all's forgiven, serving in the family shop He gets his pocket money, he's well fed Uncle Arthur past the gasworks Uncle Arthur past the river Uncle Arthur down the high street Uncle Arthur follows mother
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